Tuesday 2 September 2008

Stop

Wayne Sleep was on the radio the other day, the guy doing the interview said it was about time those dance troupes you used to get on variety shows were due a comeback. Why is is that everything over twenty years old is 'due a comeback'?

I didn't spend the best part of the 1980s fighting the Comic Strip wars just so a bunch of idiots who'd forgotten how bad stuff was the first time around think it's time it was bought back.

The sight of the Jeff Rogers Dancers on Seaside Special, Name That Tune. Shirley Bassey shows etc. was something that haunted my youth. All those grinning, energetic gits miming to a hit of the day is something that will live with me forever. Even as a seven year-old, a little bit of me died every time I saw it. The thing was, you knew they were miming, because, as my sister always used to say: "How can they jump around like that and sing at the same time?"



So what else do you think isn't due a comeback from 'the good old days?'

Here's a few suggestions:


  • The Good Old Days
  • The Black and White Minstrel Show
  • Scarlet fever
  • Banana-flavoured Toffos
  • Syphilis
  • Kloppa Castle
  • The New Schmoo
  • The Third Reich
  • Roller discos
  • Rationing
  • 'Confessions' films
  • ELP
  • The Test Card
  • Weekend World
  • Bruno Brookes
  • Clackers
  • Herman's Hermits
  • That's My Dog
  • That's My Boy!
  • The three day week
  • Derby County FC

11 comments:

Matthew Rudd said...

Heh, Derby County. Like it.

Jon Peake said...

Herman's Hermits never went away as far as I'm concerned.

Clair said...

Toast Toppers
Anita Harris
Acrobats

However, I am looking forward to the returning of Saturday night ITV variety but only if there's plate spinning accompanied by that 'DA NA NA NA NA NA - NAAA!' music.

Bright Ambassador said...

That ITV thing is touched by the hand of Vernon Kay. Shall I shooy myself now?

My mum, for some reason, used to absolutely DETEST Anita Harris. She always told some story about a fake kidnapping that happened to The Harris.

Bright Ambassador said...

Shoot myself, even.

Hawkfall said...

I was going to suggest Keith Harris to go along with Anita, and then I thought that maybe Martyn Lewis could go along with them to create an "Outer Hebrides Double Bill" Or Triple Bill. Depends how you work it.

Has anyone ever tried to make a map of Britain comprising entirely of duff celebrities?

Bright Ambassador said...

Okay, I'll start you off with celebrities of my locale:

Newark - Norman Pace and the singer off of Paper Lace

Mansfield - Alvin Sardust

Nottingham - Su Pollard

Grantham - Nicholas Parsons (his dad was the doctor who delivered Magaret Thatcher)

Lincoln - Letitia Dean

Alfreton - Robert Lindsay

Leicester - Engelbert Humperdinck

Derby - Gwen Taylor

Sleaford - Abi Titmuss

Clair said...

The word 'Sleaford' has always reminded me of slags, and now I know why.

Bright Ambassador said...

Now you also know why RAF Cranwell was built so close to Sleaford. All those young officer cadets full of joie de vivre of a Friday and Saturday night...

Kolley Kibber said...

I think it's only a matter of time before Freddie 'Parrot Face' Davies makes a comeback. Provided he's not dead of course.

Bright Ambassador said...

"I'm thick, thick, thick up to 'ere!"