I notice the Rear of the Year award has been, er, awarded for 2008. And this year's winners are - cue drumroll - Ryan Thomas (Coronation Street) and Jennifer Ellison (Brookside). Hurrah! Not.
I've always wondered who it is that votes for this, and a little Wikipedia research (That'll be reliable then) has me believing that it's organised by a shadowy organisation known as Rear of the Year Ltd. Who are these people? We need to know. And how did Ellison's and Thomas's gluteus maximus get voted over the 56 million other UK residents?And why do Year of the Year Ltd think we're so interested in whose got the best arse?
Quite frankly I've never particularly noticed either Ryan's or Ellison's botty before. Mind you, it's hardly surprising I've never noticed Ellison's on the telly before, in our house she's known as Jennifer 'Quick, Turn Over' Ellison.
If they're looking for a winner in the lady category, then I work with a lovely, 40 year-old, lady called Tina who has a posterior that's better that Kylie's by a mile. Not that I spend all day looking at Tina's backside, mark you...ooh, I'll get me coat.
I plan to start my own contest: Ear of the Year. My first nominations are as follows: Prince Charles, Mr Rumbold, Gary Linekar and a lad at work who glories in the nickname of Wingnut.
Anyway, I know you've been waiting for this, but here's that all important list of every winner in full:
1976 — Barbara Windsor
1981 — Felicity Kendal
1982 — Suzi Quatro
1983 — Lulu
1984 — Elaine Paige
1985 — Lynsey De Paul
1986 — Anneka Rice and Michael Barrymore
1987 — Anita Dobson
1988 — Su Pollard
1989 — Marina Ogilvy
1992 — Ulrika Jonsson
1993 — Sarah Lancashire
1994 — Mandy Smith
1995 — Lisa Riley (as Mandy Dingle)
1996 — Tracy Shaw
1997 — Melinda Messenger and Gary Barlow
1998 — Carol Smillie and Frank Skinner
1999 — Denise van Outen and Robbie Williams
2000 — Jane Danson and Graham Norton
2001 — Claire Sweeney and John Altman
2002 — Charlotte Church and Scott Wright
2003 — Natasha Hamilton and Ronan Keating
2004 — Alex Best and Aled Haydn-Jones
2005 — Nell McAndrew and Will Young
2006 — Javine Hylton and Ian Wright
2007 — Siân Lloyd and Lee Mead
2008 — Jennifer Ellison and Ryan Thomas
1981 — Felicity Kendal
1982 — Suzi Quatro
1983 — Lulu
1984 — Elaine Paige
1985 — Lynsey De Paul
1986 — Anneka Rice and Michael Barrymore
1987 — Anita Dobson
1988 — Su Pollard
1989 — Marina Ogilvy
1992 — Ulrika Jonsson
1993 — Sarah Lancashire
1994 — Mandy Smith
1995 — Lisa Riley (as Mandy Dingle)
1996 — Tracy Shaw
1997 — Melinda Messenger and Gary Barlow
1998 — Carol Smillie and Frank Skinner
1999 — Denise van Outen and Robbie Williams
2000 — Jane Danson and Graham Norton
2001 — Claire Sweeney and John Altman
2002 — Charlotte Church and Scott Wright
2003 — Natasha Hamilton and Ronan Keating
2004 — Alex Best and Aled Haydn-Jones
2005 — Nell McAndrew and Will Young
2006 — Javine Hylton and Ian Wright
2007 — Siân Lloyd and Lee Mead
2008 — Jennifer Ellison and Ryan Thomas
Su Pollard? They need help. And who, exactly, is Marina Ogilvy and Scott Wright?
4 comments:
Scott Wright played Sam the stripper-turned-builder in Coronation Street. He was a bit hammy but the girls liked him.
Charlotte Church was only 16 when she won, leading to lots of humbug and uproar from the tabloids about how we shouldn't be looking at a 16 year old girl's bottom.
How come I wasn't in the running? Geographic discrimination I tell you.
I wonder why there was no rear of the year between 79 and 81 and also in 1990?
I've always thought it was whoever's flavour of the month, but Ellison and Thomas are not even flavour of the decade, so how it's worked out, bugger only knows.
They probably have a look to see who's available on the day they take the photos, and who hasn't got an arse the size of a small country.
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