What do you think of Glastonbury then? I must say that this year I have no interest whatsoever. I've spent too many hours fast-forwarding through recordings of it in the past and it's going to be a nice weekend, so my plan is not to watch any of it. To be honest, I think Status Quo have got it about right, they honest about only doing it for the money and it's true that up until about fifteen years ago the general consensus was that it was a hippy fest where Hawkwind would play long into the night and The Levellers would encourage all their crusty mates to climb over the fence.
The problem is that it's taken on this air of - ever since it was first televised in 1994 - 'if you're not here then you don't matter.' Personally I can think of a lot more places I'd rather be, like down in a sewer or even on the end of a skewer. I've been to rock festivals and large open air gigs in the past and they're not very satisfying, even for just one day. Factor into that the fact that you have to camp, can't get a shower, go for no.2s in rancid toilets, there's little shade and get wet all makes it for not a very pleasant experience. The last open air gig I went to was Ozzfest in 2001, and that was really only to see the reformed Black Sabbath. I doubt I'll go to an open air gig again. It's a captive audience, at Milton Keynes bowl you're not even allowed to take your own drinks in, so on the two occasions I've been there, people have been tipping away gallon after gallon of perfectly serviceable drink at the gate on hot days just so they can get in.
Getting back to Glastonbury, I'm not even all that keen on who's on, apart form Madness:
The problem is that it's taken on this air of - ever since it was first televised in 1994 - 'if you're not here then you don't matter.' Personally I can think of a lot more places I'd rather be, like down in a sewer or even on the end of a skewer. I've been to rock festivals and large open air gigs in the past and they're not very satisfying, even for just one day. Factor into that the fact that you have to camp, can't get a shower, go for no.2s in rancid toilets, there's little shade and get wet all makes it for not a very pleasant experience. The last open air gig I went to was Ozzfest in 2001, and that was really only to see the reformed Black Sabbath. I doubt I'll go to an open air gig again. It's a captive audience, at Milton Keynes bowl you're not even allowed to take your own drinks in, so on the two occasions I've been there, people have been tipping away gallon after gallon of perfectly serviceable drink at the gate on hot days just so they can get in.
Getting back to Glastonbury, I'm not even all that keen on who's on, apart form Madness:
- Bruce Springsteen - Can't stand his songs about unwanted pregnancy, getting laid off and ridiculous gas-guzzling cars. Songs in a live setting seem to go on for twenty minutes each.
- Neil Young - Wrinkled old git in a plaid shirt playing interminable fuzzboxed guitar solos. Only like on of his songs, that one that goes "Keep on rockin' in the free world!", it goes "Keep on rockin' in the free world!". I think it's called Rockin' in the Free World.
- Blur - Best of a bad bunch of headliners. Just bet they don't play Country House.
- The Specials - Do me a favour, Thatcher's gone.
- Kasabian - A band I couldn't more give a toss about you couldn't find. Nothing particularly wrong with them, just never been moved to buy any of their records.
- Spinal Tap - Just leave it at the film, eh lads?
- Tom Jones and Tony Christie - You know my views on those two already.
- Crosby, Stills and Nash - What's this, granddad's day out, or what?
So, as Mary Ann Hobbs wouldn't say, you won't "see me down the front", you'll see me in the beer garden with my Magner's pear cider. Have a good weekend.
6 comments:
And those between band interviews on hay bales - ridiculous. I'll be at this festival over the weekend (it's a 10 minute bike ride away)
Mrs M was at Donnington when Guns N Roses played and almost got crushed in the rush, as they came on..
PS nice Stranglers reference
I went to Monsters of Rock at Donington twice. Unfortunately the first year was perhaps the worst line-up in the festival's history: Whitesnake, Aerosmith, Poison, Thunder and The Quireboys. Having said that, Aerosmith did bring Jimmy Page onstage for a version of Train Kept A-Rollin'. Every cloud, eh?
Mrs M can count herself very luckuy considering what happened to those other two lads when GnR came on in 1988.
You can't beat a bit of early Stranglers.
Think I remember that one did Pagey pull it off he was a bit flaky in the 80s
I saw Aerosmith at Hammersmith Odeon (a warm up gig for something bigger)and they wheeled on Coverdale for the encore..and saw Quireboys supporting Faster Pussycat
Mrs M's a bit of a rocker and has even bought Marillion, Maiden and Tull albums..
PS - We've got Motorhead, The Damned and Girschool on the same bill later this year.
By that time Page was off the skag and completing his rehabilitation, I think he'd not long released that career-ressurecting Outrider album.
Just being in the same field as a bona fide legend was enough for me that day. To make it better, for some reason, Concorde took off from neighbouring East Midlands Airport just as Page was being introduced.
I've been thinking of going to that Motorhead tour myself, they're coming to Nottingham.
You've got to go - you can't miss the 'head. Saw 'em 86 couldn't get near the front though, it was loaded up with unmovable bikers..
I've got Outrider somewhere, not all that is it..
PS - Have you read Dave Thompson's I Hate New Music well worth a wallop
Think you're missing out. I went to Reading and Donington plenty of times in the eighties. Yes, it was shite.
But festivals have changed since 2001. The mix of people is considerably wider than it used to be. Audiences are much more open to varied styles of music. If you'd tried to put Madness, Blur and Nick Cave together on a bill a decade ago, they'd all have been bottled off.
And best of all, I've actually found that lots of young people are quite nice. I thought they were all crazed knife-wielding morons, having once read this in the Daily Mail.
Give it another chance!
I've seen The Pixies, Rage Against The Machine and REM in the last 12 months. Definitely worth the inconvenience of a few portaloos.
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