Thursday 28 January 2010

Do have nightmares


Nothing much on telly at the minute, is there? Well apart from Mad Men but we'll take that as read. Nothing much on telly found me recording I Believe in UFOs with Danny Dyer for a bit of fluff for me who likes a UFO story.
Who is this man, Dyer? He's supposed to be some sort of actor but I'm buggered if I've ever seen him in anything. He looks like the sort of berk who appears in films glamourising football violence. He looks like the type who'd describe himself as an "East End hard man, a bit woo, a bit whey". I've never been in a fight in my life but I guarantee that I could floor him. Whatever, his main 'talents' appear to be looking at all times like he's just woken up with a hangover and swearing a lot. And I mean a lot. Regular readers have probably noticed that I like a good swear, but where it's fitting. This Dyer seems to use it as punctuation.
Anyway, the programme was incredibly tedious. He has no skills for making an investigative film whatsoever. The programme seemed to obsess itself with Dyer wandering around like he'd just smoked a spliff going "Gor fackin' blimey, these fackin' crop circles are weird, ain't they?" The 'high point' came with Dyer buggering off to Colorado (with my licence fee) to talk to a bloke who claimed to once have an alien look through his window. And guess what? He only had a video camera set up with night vision to hand to record the whole thing on, didn't he? This so-called alien was clearly a man wearing the sort of alien mask you can find in any party shop. The 'alien' then thought he saw the guy filming and bobbed down from the window, then re-appeared as if playing a game of intergalactic peek-a-boo. Cue "Cor, fackin' 'ells!" aplenty from Dyer, clearly the world's most gullible man.
Anyway, it was so mind-numbingly dull I dropped off to sleep before the end.

Dropping off to sleep made me miss the beginning of Crimewatch. I don't normally watch Crimewatch but last night's featured a case my sister's working on, so I thought I'd better look in and see if I could be of any assistance and to encourage her along via the television. Thanks to Dyer's dreary antics I missed it.
What I want to say is that Kirsty Young doesn't say "Don't have nightmares" at the end. What's all that about? Just because she's some Glaswegian nutcase who probably isn't frightened of anything doesn't mean I am. I didn't sleep very well at all, thank you, Kirsty.

4 comments:

Jon Peake said...

You are spot on about Danny Dyer. You don't need to know much more about him except he's the world's biggest tit and near the top of my hate list.

Bright Ambassador said...

Now that's a list I'd like to see.

Matthew Rudd said...

He was in Green Fingers. That's all I know about him.

Zoey said...

Goood post