I gather there's a show on Radio4 called I've Never Seen Star Wars. I've never heard it of course because it's a comedy show on Radio4, and it's hosted by a smug twat called Marcus Brigstocke. I think it's quite a good premise for a show (Even though the guests are the usual Radio4 crowd. Sandi Toksvig anyone? And who the hell's Jan Ravens?), so I thought I'd do my own 'I've never...'
Here goes. Some are by choice, some aren't, some are because the opportunity's never arose. You decide which is which:
- I've never seen Star Wars or an episode of Star Trek.
- I've never heard I've Never Seen Star Wars.
- I've never eaten a Bounty bar.
- I've never been in control of any kind of boat.
- I've never ridden a motorcycle.
- I've never been on a rollercoaster that throws you upside down.
- I've never been to Spain.
- I've never seen an episode of The Simpsons, The Sopranos, Casualty, Holby City, The West Wing, The Wire, 24, Hollyoaks.
- I've never heard I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue, Desert Island Discs, Just a Minute.
- I've never bought anything by The Beatles.
- I've never been to a fancy dress party.
- I've never had a gin and tonic.
- I've never seen The Godfather, Citizen Kane, Schindler's List.
- I've never eaten Marmite.
- I've never been to a classical music concert.
- I've never been in Harrod's.
- I've never spoken to anyone famous while they were still famous.
- I've never read anything by JK Rowling or JRR Tolkein.
- I've never skied.
- I've never been involved in a car accident.
- I've never seen a stripper.
- I've never built a bonfire.
- I've never parachuted/bungee-jumped.
- I've never tried a Class A drug.
- I've never been fishing.
- I've never kissed in the rain.
- I've never fired a gun.
- I've never been to me (and I haven't been to Paradise either).
6 comments:
I went to me once. But it was shut.
I've been to Paradise (it's a crappy nature reserve just outside Cambridge), but I've never been to Leeds.
I've never had a pet of any description.
Interesting list BA. I have seen all the Star Wars films, but saw the first one when I was twelve and found it hugely entertaining. I can still sit through any of the original three. I don't understand the quasi-religious cult status they've gained though.
I've also seen a lot of episodes of Star Trek. It was a sci-fi tv show on TV every week when I was a kid, so I was in it's target audience.
I watched the first LOTR film and couldn't get to the end. Couldn't get past the first few pages of the first book.
Why have you never seen The Simpsons, The Sopranos, The West Wing or The Wire? They are among the greatest TV show ever made. Have you just not got around to it yet? or do you dislike the idea of them? I can understand watching one or two episodes and deciding it's not your thing? Or have you just not got round to them yet?
No-one in their right mind watches Hollyoaks.
Right:
False
True
True
True
True
False
False
True
True
True
True
True
True
False
True
False
True
True
True
False
True
False
True
True
True
True
True
True
VS - The Simpsons the greatest TV show ever made? It was Do The Bart Man which put them off me for life.
As for the others, I'm just not fussed about them. The Wire's been over-hyped and I know I'd be disappointed. I don't really have the time to sit down and watch hours and hours of it either. Why can't they be more like British series' where you never get more than six in one hit?
Clair - There's no 'true or false' about it, it's ALL true.
Post a Comment